Choice Words: Twilight vs. Buffy

I think this post, which first appeared on July 29th, is particularly relevant because New Moon has just been released.

July 29th, 2009 by Chen
 
I haven’t been living under a rock, so I know that the Twilight book/movie/pop culture phenomenon is hugely popular. Almost as big as Twilight’s fandom is the amount of discussion about Bella and Edward’s relationship. Everyone’s got an opinion. I guess I’m not that qualified to review Twilight since I have not read the books or seen the movie, but I have been reading the blogosphere debates (flame wars?) about vampire guy/human girl relationships. I defer to this YouTube video and its accompanying explanation by its creator. I think it best shows that not all vampire/human relationships and male/female romances have to play out Stephanie Meyer’s way. And it’s funny.

Jonathan McIntosh of Rebellious Pixel, created this video and explains the reason for making it:

In this re-imagined narrative, Edward Cullen from the Twilight Series meets Buffy the Vampire Slayer. It’s an example of transformative storytelling serving as a pro-feminist visual critique of Edward’s character and generally creepy behavior. Seen through Buffy’s eyes, some of the more sexist gender roles and patriarchal Hollywood themes embedded in the Twilight saga are exposed – in hilarious ways. Ultimately this remix is about more than a decisive showdown between the slayer and the sparkly vampire. It also doubles as a metaphor for the ongoing battle between two opposing visions of gender roles in the 21st century.

Before seeing this video, I have read critiques of Twilight, contrasting it with Buffy the Vampire Slayer, such as this review from Salon.

Comparisons to another famous human girl with a vampire boyfriend are inevitable, but Bella Swan is no Buffy Summers. “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” was at heart one of those mythic hero’s journeys so beloved by Joseph Campbell-quoting screenwriters, albeit transfigured into something sharp and funny by making the hero a contemporary teenage girl. Buffy wrestled with a series of romantic dilemmas — in particular a penchant for hunky vampires — but her story always belonged to her. Fulfilling her responsibilities as a slayer, loyalty to her friends and family, doing the right thing and cobbling together some semblance of a healthy life were all ultimately as important, if not more important, to her than getting the guy.

Jonathan McIntosh writes a longer expose on Twilight/Buffy called What Would Buffy Do?
 
There are readers and moviegoers who simultaneously object to Bella and Edward’s antifeminist relationship and enjoy the series. I may be even be such a fan, if I ever watch more than the movie trailer or the Amazon.com book review. But I don’t think I will pick up the books because if I’m in the mood for the vampire genre, Buffy is the more palatable choice.

 

Being young, smart, rich, and beautiful doesn't make you immune.

Today I listened to the Diane Reim show. The guest for the second half was Leslie Morgan Steiner. She is the author of Crazy Love, a memoir of her abusive marriage. The show was also about this relationship. She spoke honestly and sincerely about why she stayed with her abusive boyfriend, who then became her abusive husband, for several years. I liked her appearance on the show for two reasons.

First, she was candid in admitting that she loved her ex-husband even as the abuse happened. There were aspects of his personality that she loved. After all, she did fall in love with him. This psychological hold he had on her made it all the more difficult for her to leave. People say that money can't buy love. Well, money can't buy you out of love either. By other standards, she was in a perfect position to. She was financially secure, had her own job, and didn't have kids.

She stayed because she wanted their relationship to work. Her ex-husband had grown up in an abusive family and she didn't want to let him down the way other people in his life had. I think it's okay to feel some sympathy here for her ex-husband. But let me be clear: pity, sympathy, and not wanting to give up should not make someone remain in the relationship. Leslie Morgan Steiner realized ultimately that the help he needed was beyond what she could give; her presence was making it worse for both of them.

Second, both she and her husband were people you perhaps wouldn't normally think of as abuser and survivor. The point is that it can happen to anyone. He was Ivy League educated with a high-paying Wall Street job. She was also Ivy League educated and came from “a good family”. I don't think we can write her off as a poor little rich girl complaining about her glamorous Manhattan life. It's not only the poor mom with lots of kids and no education in the ghettos or in the developing world. Being young, smart, rich, and beautiful doesn't make you immune.

You can listen to the show here.

I would gladly use a free domestic violence prevention pen.

This article in the NYTimes today was very encouraging.

Taking a Page, and a Pen, From Makers of Medicine

Free pens — bearing the names of drugs like Viagra and Januvia rather than the letters NYC — litter doctors’ offices all across New York, part of an often-criticized strategy by drug company sales representatives known as detailers, who traditionally go from waiting room to waiting room giving gifts to entice doctors to prescribe their products.

Now in New York, there is a new kind of detailer: people like Ms. Franklin, who are part of a campaign by the city to use pharmaceutical industry marketing savvy to spread the word about healthy practices to doctors in neighborhoods where patients often have the least access to the latest news in health care.

I think it's a very creative and simple way to engage health care providers in their patients' well being. In particular, I liked that this article highlighted a domestic violence prevention campaign, which does not usually fall in the duty of health care providers. Yet doctors are in a special position to speak to their patients honestly and confidentially about not just their bodily functions but their family situations too. I hope this idea takes off. I would gladly use a free domestic violence prevention pen.

I have no illusions that physicians are limited in their ability to mediate domestic violence. I mean, we're not asking them to all quit their jobs and work at domestic violence shelters. I think that we should recognize that health care providers have within them opportunities to care for their patients in many ways, and we should make use of them. All they can do is ask their patients and coax them into seeking help. But even "just" talking about domestic violence can have a powerful effect to recognize that abuse happens and to offer help.

In that spirit, I want to plug MSU Safe Place. I'm proud that MSU has its own domestic violence shelter. It is the only university in the country with a shelter program. Its shelter, counseling, and support services are free, confidential, and for MSU students, faculty, staff, their families and children. Like the article emphasized, dating and domestic violence happens to young people, old people, married couples, and unmarried couples, so college students can just as much be abusive relationships.